Life Isn’t Fair

It sounds good but it’s not true. Life is fair. No matter how good someone’s life is it isn’t any better or worse than yours. It’s just different. Trouble knocks at their doorstep just like it does yours. Life doesn’t care how much you have, nothing will allow you to escape the storms of life. There is one thing thats true, no matter how “down” you are tonight there will always be a new dawn that releases all the joy and love the world has to offer. Now how long that “night” is, no one knows. Not you, not I. One thing could happen in an instance that robs you of all joy, in that same moment someone else could receive news that  shines  a bright light in their dark places. That’s how quick your life can turn around.

Life offers few constants, nothing is guaranteed. That’s why you must make a decision that you will live fully in that moment, even in the dark times, breathe the sadness in the air. When you allow yourself to feel the true pain of those moments, you appreciate when times are better much more.

We are often taught to get over things, to let things go, and while all of those things are necessary, everything must be done in order. How else would you be able to tell what you’re getting over unless you feel thoroughly what you are going through?

Don’t be afraid of the dark moments in life, the times when God blows the light out of your hope. Feel those moments, embrace the pain that you’ve gone through. Fully feel the pain of your struggle, of your divorce, of your childhood, of your failures…Take a deep breath, take it all in. Cry over those broken promises, grieve the loss of that dream and then like any good deep breath…Exhale….Exhale… You may have to do it more than once, you may have to take more breathes than the person beside you and that’s okay. My recovery process is different than yours. My heart broke in different places than yours. Everyone is owed their own process…

Be weary of those who move on rapidly, they are avoiding the pain. I say pain is good for you, it teaches you things that joy doesn’t…Pain can make a person determine they never want to go through something again..Some cuts hurt so deep it teaches a person to never take a certain road again. And there are pains that are just as excruciating…like birthing pains, that hurt so bad in the process but once you’ve finished with that pain you have a gift so sweet it makes the pain worth it.

Either way, no matter what your struggle is, no matter how bad it hurts, or how unexpected it was…there is a lesson in that hurt that is worth the pain.



  1. I use to feel just as Carla do. But over all I know God got me. He will never take me to what He won’t bring me through.

  2. @Carla, i know ur life circumstances may not be good n i dont believe God created u to suffer n i believe God cld nt stop u frm coming to this world becuz God has planned that a woman wil give birth naturaly if she gets involved in sex so God cld nt stop u frm coming to this world n ur family but he has a good plan for u,he wants to express his love n glory through u till u become a wonder to this world,God can give u a sweet life if u fix ur gaze on him,dnt worry if u dnt ave family to support u,they dnt matter,the only one u need is God cuz he is big enough.

  3. Wonderful… Hard to chew but its just the truth

  4. Love the part that said “Pain teaches you what Joy doesn’t”. Lovely piece

  5. Life is not fair when you get judge for things you did not say or do. Life is not fair when you keep trying yet, nothing happens. Life is not fair because most people do not have “Fair” in their vocabulary. Life is not “Fair” because most people don’t have that trait for their character. Individuals can strive to be fair on the basis of their character, but most people have a character flaw when it comes to being fair, “Life is not fair.”

    It’s really easy to say that “life is fair” when you have a host of support. Some of us are struggling financially, and lack the financial resources to do better. Not to mention not having a family, church, or any other support to help us get through our trials or afflictions. Yes, I have God, but you have a wonderful Father, Mother, siblings support and a host of other support mechanisms to help you cope with life. When people don’t feel any love and all they feel is rejection, then they do feel like life is not fair.

    • Carla,

      I challenge you to remember that life may be hard but your life IS fair because it is the road that God saw fit for you to travel. He sees something in you that you may not see right now, but all of those “strikes” you feel are prohibiting you from having a fair life are just tools that God saw fit for you to overcome. My struggles are different from yours. I may have family support that you do not have but I also struggles that you cannot begin to imagine. No one’s life is as cookie cutter as it seems, not mine not yours. If all the love you ever feel lis the love you feel for yourself, and the love God has for you, your heart can be overwhelmed with that. Perhaps you are too familiar with rejection, and that is the risk of love but there are people who feel just as rejected as you, who need love to touch hurting places just as you do. Find a place where you feel you fit, volunteer with foster kids who feel just as rejected. Be the love and support you desire and see if God doesn’t show you the same in return.


    • hi Carla i agree with Sara, here i am in my late thirties, mother of three, wife, and most of all i am my own individual per say i know my identity. i often tell my husband, kids, friends and whomever your life is what you make of it. i want to back up for a moment and say to you that i know the excruciating pain of rejection all to well. can you imagine being rejected by the one that birth you and other family members, but in all of that it was God who taught me that rejection is only redirection. and with every step of my life i have learn to channel my pain into something positive, for instance many of my very close relatives had many negative things to say about me, the resounding of being told i would never amount to anything caused me to look around and decide if i would become a ca million and reduce my life to their opinion which caused much hurt or do i rise above their negativity and keep moving, i choose to do the latter and i do not have a great deal of support i have made the word of God the main middle and final authority of my life and what ever God has written in scripture supersedes any pain or negativity i have faced in my past or will face in my future. i am not going to hand you this as if everyday has been easy because it hasn’t. what helps me to keep going is the LOVE of God and knowing that what God says about me is truth and truth will out life any lie, opinion or pain. i challenge you to grab hold of the sure promises of God confess his promises over your life and as you do so watch any and all doubt, fears, pain and uncertainties dissipate. only what God says about you should take precedence in your life. if you keep moving what once seemed to be an obstacle will become a testimony that you will be able to share with others i will pray for you God Bless

    • HI Carla I hear you. I use to think that way but now being a new believer in Christ I now just say that God is making things right for me whether its good or bad, big or small.

      In HIs word, God says that I (we) will still have trials come my way as a believer(s), so I have to know that God is using those moments for a purpose. A while ago I went through something that broke me down and I was just a wreck. I did not look to the Lord right away so I was just full of emotions and reactions, a cycle of confusion. I then just got myself together and prayed, I ask the Lord ” what am I suppose to learn from this?” He sure did answer me and now I was at peace. In moments where we want to complain or where we fall, we have to get back up and look to the Lord for strength. Job sticks out to me sometimes when I go through trials and I love how he still did not waiver His love for God. Yes he had moments but he still looked to God during his sufferings, Amen!

      We also need to not concern ourselves with the things in the world and the people in (hope I’m clear on scripture with that one). Everyone has there own troubles and issues that they are going through. We need to pray for (believers); everyone; our enemies or those people that try put us down, because we don’t want to repay with anger and/or judgment. I also had to deal with something like this yesterday. I was so frustrated and upset at someone that I was so not going to get over it. But I went straight to the Lord for guidance, and there I knew what I had to do, the key was show ‘love.’ It wasn’t easy but I knew I had to obey. Once I finally first forgave I started to love, then eventually I ended up forgetting why I was upset. Love sure does cover all. His word is truly alive, Amen!

      If you still struggle with issues, I encourage you to just pray (talk) to the Lord. He is such and amazing friend and counselor. I am learning to pray for the Holy Spirit to lead my life and not my emotions. I struggle with being overly sensitive and overly anxious sometimes, two extremes lol. I see how the Spirit is working through me and I feel so much peace in my life every day.

      God is the only one that knows you and your needs, so seek HIm and He will surly give you answers. God is for relationships, for He said “its not good for man to be alone,” that is why He sent the Holy Spirit to be our helper, Amen! But if you need the physical assurance, pray that God will place the right people in your life to support you and pray with you.

      I don’t want you to tell you I have all the answers, I just want to show you God does.
      Be blessed

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